Just having one of those bad days.. Vent here!

Today, I found out that I wont be getting my $4,000 I'm supposed to get in October from my summer job. fml

Why wont' you be getting it?

nepitism

Have you ever had one of those projects where you spend a month working on every detail only to have the biggest hurdle come right after you finish it?

Well, I've been working on a comic strip that was originally meant to be six panels tops (in black and white). I got overly ambitious and turned it into twelve full-color panels with cartoony and intricate details.

So after a month of coloring, inking and teaching myself how to draw certain things on the fly, it turns out the comic is just slightly too big for my scanner.

I've tried scanning it in halves and piecing them together on my computer, I tried to ask a friend for help and there's been no such luck.

Oy...

Hopefully a trip to Staples tomorrow will do the trick.

I'm a RA (resident assistant/advisor) at my college and I had been on call alllllll weekend. I usually see a lot of crazy stuff in this job, but the intense stuff is pretty much few and far between.

Basically the past 3 days have just been out of control for some reason, with residents getting sick, injured, pooping all over the place etc. BUT, tonight was my first night off since Thursday!
I take a break from my homework to watch a little family guy when I hear someone knocking on my door. It's one of my residents who is worried about another one of mine who looks not good at all. Can't even walk. And it's not alcohol/drug related.

Long story short an ambulance was called and this poor kid was taken to a hospital like an hour away, we have no clue how he is doing, whats wrong with him...so yeah. Hopefully we'll find out tomorrow...but I thought I'd vent it out a little here before bed.

I am currently listening to my roommate and my friend have porno sex. There is only one thin wall between our beds. I can hear everything.

djqwiksilver wrote:

Zack wrote:

with residents getting sick, injured, pooping all over the place etc.

my thoughts exactly.

Today just sucks, I dont know why..... I woke up early.... I can't sleep. I feel depressed for no reason.... no reason that I can see anyway. Maybe it's boredom.... ever since I graduated, I keep looking for things to do to occupy my time, but everything ends up boring me. I turn to music for solace. But it's not working.... Not even NIN can make me happy today. I keep asking the big questions... the same ones I've been asking for years.. why am I here...do I have a purpose... why does everything seem so meaningless and pointless......?? lol There are no answers. I hate being bored. See what happens when I get bored? My mind wanders off and thinks about stupid things I can't control....Blah.... Blah... Blah Di Blah Blah!!

Like, I was playing around on facebook and what not, and I was looking at some pics of one of my online friends.... and it literally made me jealous to see him in pics with all of his friends... laughing, and smiling, and partying and hanging out..... Like, why would that make me jealous? I'll probably never meet this person, and stupid things like that shouldnt bother me but today they did. I mean, I have my own friends... I party, I hang out...people are always calling me, mind you.... I usually ignore my phone.... because well....I don't like to be bothered most of the time..... Am I rambling? I don't really care.....

I can't wait untill I move to a new apartment. It will give me something to do.... decorate a new place and make it perfect...... I hate being bored... sigh. Boredom is killing me. Maybe I DO need to go get a job...I just can't stand working. I have worked everywhere, really, it feels that way. It's not the work that I mind, it's not being told what to do that I mind.... it's the other people you have to deal with, co-workers....there is always some stupid bitch or asshole that I don't get along with and so I end up quitting.... it has happened so many times. People suck... they just suck... I hate assholes and liars.... and I don't like idiots..... rant rant rant ..... I love Trent Reznor....

The more that we take
The paler we get
I can’t remember what it is
We try to forget
The tile on the floor
So cold it could sting
In your eyes is a place
Worth remembering

For you to go and take this
And smash it apart
I’ve gone all this fucking way
To wind up back at…back at the start

Well, it hides in the dark
Like the withering vein
We didn’t give it a mouth
So it cannot complain
We never really had a chance
We never really make it through
I never think I’d believe
I believed I could get better with you

Hey!
The closer we think we are
Well, it never got us so far
Now you’ve got anything left to show?
No, no I didn’t think so.
Hey!
The sooner we realize
We cover ourselves with lies
But underneath we’re not so tough
And love is not enough

Love is not enough

Sounds like an existential crisis to me.

yeah, well, it feels like a crisis. My day never got any better. In fact it got worse. I have a terrible headache. I just want this day to end so I can wake up tomorrow and hopefully feel better. All I really want is to be loved. lol isnt that corny? I just want my man to be nice to me today, and love me and be sweet. I don't feel good.

5 shifts in a row.. is one too many.. I get one day off.. then I have 5 more days.. FML

Cops showing up at your door.. at midnight.. because a friend of yours called the cops on you due to being extremely worried about you.. and you end up being at the hospital for 3 hours.. UGH that was not fun.. I just wanted to fricken sleep!

I have had the flu for the last day and while it seems to be getting better, I just want it to go away completely. My roommate has been really cool about it which is awesome, as has other friends and stuff. The only thing that isn't good is I missed class today because I could barely move without feeling like I was going to pass out and this class I had today we had a test so I'm really hoping the teacher lets me make it up.

Zack, we must trade RA stories sometime. This past weekend I also had to call an ambulance, but it was for a student who almost died from alcohol poisoning. Then I had a girl who wanted to kill herself, and then I had a guy whose room was broken into a pranked...hard.

Easily the busiest three nights of my life.

STUPID EFFING LANDLOOOOOOORD!

I've been in this apartment for a month now. First of all, alllllllll summer we had to CONTINUALLY call and email him, because he'd tell us NOTHING. We weren't sure how we'd get our keys, when we could move in, what utilities were included (he told us several months ago, but we forgot), etc. etc. It got to the point our MOMS had to call, because he refused to talk to us.

And the apartment he showed us earlier this year was GORGEOUS. And OF COURSE he showed us the ONE nice apartment in the whole building. Our apartment is NOTHING like it, EVEN THOUGH he promised ours would be JUST like that one!

But the taps in the shower keep falling off, our back door has no lock, there's no microwave (the apartment was supposed to come with it), we were never given a laundry key, and the lights keep randomly going off, and EVERY TIME he says he's sending over an electrician, no one shows up, and EACH TIME he claims "Oh, well, he went and you guys weren't there!" EVEN THOUGH WE WERE ALL HOME AT THAT TIME! A couple weeks ago we had NO power at ALL for a whole day, and he was like "I'll be over right away!" AND NEVER SHOWED UP!

And today, he shows up, and he's like "Where's your rent for this month!?" And my roommate Becky was like "Well, I can write you mine now, but Jess and Kai are in class right now." And he starts FREAKING out, being like "I should be charging you all late fees! I TOLD YOU I'D BE HERE TODAY!" And Becky was like "WTF? No you did! You refuse to answer our phone calls and emails!" And he was like "Whatever! I NEED IT NOW!!!!" And he's totally pissed off that my other roomie Kai, and I were in class instead of waiting for him with our checks, even though he never told us he was coming!!

Uggggggggggggggh, we've been emailing and calling him twice a week for 5 weeks now, and he's still not doing any of the repairs that we NEED done! I mean, we're 3 teenager girls! We can't just NOT have a lock on our back door! But he doesn't even care and he's being a huge DOUCHEBAG ABOUT IT!

I hate my liiiiiiiiiiiiife!

Just plain fuck.

I feel like shit. I went to a psychologist today, thinking I was going to have a real session, but it turns out I was just squeezed in between two real appointments. We talked for like, twenty minutes, he decided to hook me up with another appointment this Thursday to do a pharmaceutical evaluation...basically which drug to put me on...

What sucks is that the whole things seems so mechanical that it's depressed me even more. Like "here, this human isn't working properly, let's find some duct tape and patch 'er up." Granted, I figured there'd eventually be some medication involved, but after twenty minutes?

I guess I expected someone to actually give a shit...

I have no motivation to do anything. I don't feel like doing my homework...I won't. I have a paper due Thursday...it's going to suck. I have my radio show tomorrow morning...I don't want to go. I just kinda hate everything right now, and I feel broken, and I don't feel like anything can really fix it.

awwww Dougie. Im sorry. I know life can sometimes suck. And sometimes it feels as if one thing after another hits you. I'm no psychologist, and I can't fix anyones problems..... But I do care.... and I can listen ..... and I will always do my best to be a good friend to anyone that needs a friend. If you want to just talk sometime, all you gotta do is text me, beep me on AIm, send me a facebook message, or a pm here at ORg. I'm so sorry that you are having a rough time. Just keep your chin up and smile. Somedays are better than others, I'll pray for you that good days come your way.







I came here to vent about how shitty I feel.... but now... I dont feel like venting. My stupid insecurities and problems are irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. I just want my friends to be happy. It frustrates me that I can't do more sometimes. I feel so small and...helpless? I can't do anything for anyone. *crawls back into my hole* ....

i just had a really bad job interview. ugh, i totally bombed it. i've only had one job interview where i didn't get the job. UGH

38 hours of work next week yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah oh and 4 days of open aka being at work for 8am yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

Doug wrote:

Just plain fuck.

I feel like shit. I went to a psychologist today, thinking I was going to have a real session, but it turns out I was just squeezed in between two real appointments. We talked for like, twenty minutes, he decided to hook me up with another appointment this Thursday to do a pharmaceutical evaluation...basically which drug to put me on...

What sucks is that the whole things seems so mechanical that it's depressed me even more. Like "here, this human isn't working properly, let's find some duct tape and patch 'er up." Granted, I figured there'd eventually be some medication involved, but after twenty minutes?

I guess I expected someone to actually give a shit...

I have no motivation to do anything. I don't feel like doing my homework...I won't. I have a paper due Thursday...it's going to suck. I have my radio show tomorrow morning...I don't want to go. I just kinda hate everything right now, and I feel broken, and I don't feel like anything can really fix it.

While I don't personally believe that medication is useful as a tool for psychotherapy, I wouldn't be discouraged by it. Medicine, when paired with continued psychotherapy, can be really useful. Just make sure you don't rely completely on the meds, if prescribed. Them alone are not the answer and really just make things harder once you quit taking them (if you haven't fixed the underlying problem).

Don't think of medication like 'duct tape' because if you only use it to patch your issues, then, like duct tape wouldn't fix a leak forever, it will fail. Think of it like this. If you have a leak in a pipe, you can start by turning the water off so that you can replace or properly patch the problem pipe. The medication will help the immediate future in improving your mood/symptoms (if in fact prescribed) which is kinda like turning off the water. To truly fix the problem you're going to need to confront and deal with whatever issues are on your plate (not gonna ask) which is hopefully something your psychologist will do after he finishes his evaluations (This is all ideal in my opinion, and other psychologists aren't always so).

Hope this helps, hang in there.

My roommates are lazy-asses. I've been up working all morning, and at 11am (really closer to noon) I clean the kitchen and start the dish-washer. My roommates, who's bedrooms are downstairs, have all been up and gone to class and come home... so it's not like I am interrupting their deep sleep. One of em, though, yelled up after about five minutes "Bill... love you" which is code for "turn off the fucking dishwasher you jerk I'm sleeping." I love my roommates but sometimes I just wish they wouldn't get so cranky when I 'inconvenience' them.

Now that I have a job, I feel like my hatred of people is increasing daily,

FML so much work.. so little time.. so much shit with stupid games.. so much drama in my life in general.. my course.. I put off yet again and now I have like 150 pages to read by tomorrow hahaha and i have to work today! Plus yesterday I get to work and randomly the manager is like you know you train today right, I'm like EXCUSE ME!? Yeah so I meet the person i'm training yesterday totally not prepared that I had to train.. then I train then as well as I will today and tomorrow then one day off then on to graveyards for 3 nights.. hopefully that makes things go more smoothly but holy shit.. I think the only real GOOD thing in my life right now is I've met a really great guy!!! :D

I'm pretty sure I failed my Logic test today. Sweet, huh?