This Book Will Change Your Life: January

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Sat Jan 16, 2010 10:37 pm

OHNOZ!

Moderator Posts : 5522 Join date : 2009-09-06 Age : 40

Or just had opportunity and was like "You know, I did NOT like that letter!!!!"

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Sat Jan 16, 2010 11:29 pm

lmao! Awwwww, I'll be sad if he doesn't like my letter.

I hope he wants to be my penpal! Wink

Moderator Posts : 5522 Join date : 2009-09-06 Age : 40

I must say...that would be the most exciting pen pal to have.

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Sun Jan 17, 2010 1:46 am

"Dear Unibomber. I hope you're doing well! I've had a rough few days. I'm glad I have a penpal like you to talk to about real life problems..."

Moderator Posts : 5522 Join date : 2009-09-06 Age : 40

"Dear Jess,

I know you'll never get to read this as you are more than likely a giant smoldering hole..."

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Sun Jan 17, 2010 2:24 am

I love how he tries to kill me but still bothers writing a letter.

BRITISH EDITION - DAY 17

Today, stick a message on a banknote ((aka a dollar bill, since this book is from England, lol)). Banknotes are the ultimate media, circulating between millions every day free of charge. Benrik ((the guys who wrote this book)) believe that their purposes would reinforce the social tissue and make the spending experience a lot more "fun".

Possible messages to write:
- Darling, don't forget the milk
- Mistress Eva at (phone number)
- Mickey

Tracy
- Save the blue-crested grebe!
- Sorry about the herpes, everyone...

Stargazer Posts : 35 Join date : 2010-01-09 Age : 36

Sooooo I started this late and have been trying feverishly the past few days to get caught up! I just can’t seem to get there… so I will post what I have and try to finish the ones that are left eventually. Sorry I waited so long… this post is going to be so obnoxious. This Book Will Change Your Life: January - Page 8 Kopfschuettel

This Book Will Change Your Life: January - Page 8 Kopfschuettel

Fill in life preferences in case of amnesia:

My favorite color - purple
My favorite food – anything with tomatoes
My lucky number - 29
My sexual orientation - straight
My best foot – left (took off three layers of socks to decide!)
My best friend – All my friends are best for something, Sara and Renee
My most annoying habit – I chew on everything L
My favorite football team – Ohio State
My signature – will be worth something someday

In case of sudden death:

Should I die unexpectedly, please tell: Everyone
Confession (my worst sin) -- I did what he thought I did to him
I want to be: Cremated []
Song to be played at my funeral: Spirit in the Sky - Norman Greenbaum (Stolen from Dad)
Epitaph: Thank God for Me (Stolen from Grandpa)
Lasting regret: Never doing something completely out of my comfort zone
My stuff goes to: My sister…since she thinks its all hers already

Dear Sara (best friend), please go to my room and remove the black tin box from the top drawer of my bedside table before my poor mother finds it.

Day 1: Warm ups

- Bookmark a new website. – Does this one count? If so I did that…. If not…

On my first trial, I typed 50 wpm with 3 errors and after 1 more test its 59 wpm with 4 errors.

And... my middle name is Caroline

DAY 2: The Love of Your Life

This was harder to do than I thought… I spent the day at the middle school so… not really an appropriate way to look at your students, but did see some potential in one of the male math teachers!! I spent an extra long time asking him about the school, just in case he was the love of my life! I will keep you posted on that prospect.

I also went to the bank and saw very very little potential in the teller, I introduced myself and we had a short conversation. No sparks, but the directions were to look at everyone right?

DAY 3: Throw away something you like.

Since I just moved home I have had to do a lot of this lately. I don’t have room for all my stuff anymore… and I love to keep everything. Tough decisions, tough decisions.

I decided to throw away my Dalmatian Techno Pup – he was a loved toy I got maybe 10 years ago. I got him for Christmas and I remember my parents making a comment that it was probably going to be the last year I would get a toy for Christmas (since I was growing up) and it was. I have always kind of looked at holding on to him as holding onto that last shred of childhood. But, I only turn him on once a year when I am cleaning my room so he literally is just taking up space at this point. Off to the garbage bag little guy!

Note: As I was walking the toy to the bag I turned it on one more time to, you know, say good-bye or whatever, it went “woofbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeb” It kind of sounded like he was swearing at me!! Hahahaha!!

DAY 4: World coloring-in day!

Fill in country by country:
GREEN - Been there, done that. (Ohio, Pensyvania, Kentucky, Tenessee, West Virginia, Vermont, New York, Georgia, Florida, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, Maryland, New Jersey, Michigan, Niagra Falls)
BLUE - Intend to go there this year. (Maine, New Hampshire, The Amazon)
YELLOW - Intend to go there before I die. (The Rest of the states, Brazil, Europe, Somewhere in Africa, Japan, Austraila)
RED - Happy never to set foot there in my whole life. (If possible I would go everywhere)

DAY 5: Mass social experiment

IN PROGRESS

DAY 6: Today, write the opening sentence to your debut novel.

Its a paragraph... but the first sentence just wasn't enough.

Watch your back. It’s a warning I issue to myself a lot these days. I look in the mirror each morning and prepare myself for the day the same way a warrior prepares himself for battle. “Watch your back.” I say and I scowl into the mirror attempting to visualize my reaction to any possible confrontation with the enemy. I know he is creeping around our campus somewhere; following a schedule unknown to me. Every time I leave a building alone these quaint campus grounds become a war zone. Each fork in the road represents a new threat, a new vessel that could possibly usher his lethal self in my direction.

DAY 7: Fantasy evening

My fantasy evening would happen like this:

BACKSTORY:

It a few years from now, I am in grad school, taking classes again at a new school. There is this hot guy in my class that I can’t help but stare at during the boring parts of the lecture (yes, he has caught me looking a few times). It not just his secretly sculpted body underneath his button downs, his dark hair and eyes that attract my attention. He is always answering and asking these deep questions that amaze me. He’s smart and the professors take notice. I hear through the grapevine though, that he is not just a super obsessed student; he has a bad-boy side as well. I never have the nerve to talk to him. I consider him one of those crushes from a far that you never act on and always wish you did.

Near the end of the semester we get assigned to work on a group project together. I have to constantly restrain myself during meetings and remind myself to act professional. Before we leave one night, he hands the group a sheet with all of our contact information. I stare at his number, hoping to get the courage to call. But I don’t have to make the first move. About ten minutes after the meeting, he texts me to ask a question about the project. I try not to get excited. This is a professional matter after all. But before I can send a response, he calls. He starts the conversation saying he doesn’t understand something we are working on (I know he does… he’s smart remember?!), then he asks about my day what I am doing, etc etc. Two hours of get to know you conversation and he asks what I am doing tomorrow. I say nothing important. He says we should get together. I assume for the project, but he quickly clarifies… “No Annie, I mean we should go out tomorrow, Can I pick you up at 7?” I say yes, hang up the phone and start picking out my outfit!!

OK NOW THE DATE:

He sends me a message around 5 asking if we are still on for the evening. I say yes, he says he is excited. I spend the rest of the time with my friends prepping and getting ready. He is there at 7:05… fashionably late, giving me enough time to put the finishing touches on my hair.

The date itself is nothing spectacular; we go out to dinner (little Mexican place that is a personal favorite of both of us turns out) but barely have time to eat our food because we are talking too much. Turns out he find me just as interesting as I find him. I learn, among other things: he’s in a band, he volunteers at a local after-school program coaching basketball, he loves his family, he’s very social and loves to go to parties, he has a full time job and is working on writing a textbook. We end up staying at the restaurant talking for a long time and its about to close, but its not a problem because he tells the manager (in Spanish) that he will pay extra to let us stay (turns out the manager’s son is on the basketball team). We continue sharing story after story and secret after secret. It’s so comfortable; it feels like we have known each other forever.

We decide its time to leave and he says he wants to take me to someplace cool. He drives to a park that is closed. I try to tell him we can get into a lot of trouble by entering, but he says it will be ok. He holds my hand and practically drags me into the park. We go to the swings (he just heard they were my favorite). After swinging for a little while we go over to the pond. Its chilly so he puts his arm around me and we just sit there.

Finally he makes his move… we “hang out” in the park for a little while.

Its time to go home, but he doesn’t want the night to end. He asks if I want to go back to his house. I assume he’s implying to … you know… but I go anyways fully prepared to say no. I don’t want the night to be over either. We pull up to a house with the lights on and people laughing. “My parents must still be up” he says. He is still living at home so he can help take care of his grandparents who live with them. He seems a little embarrassed when I ask if he still lives at home, but it doesn’t bother me, because so do I.

I come in and am introduced to the whole family who welcome me with open arms. You can tell he loves his family and they love him. We play board games until the morning. It’s a lot of fun. He takes me home, and gives me a little kiss goodbye and promises to call when he wakes up…

THE END

… this better happen in my real life of I am going to be very disappointed now.

DAY 8: ADDICTION-FREE DAY

I gave up junk food for a day. I did feel more pure…

DAY 9: Do something before breakfast!

I called about my student teaching placement right when I got up and found out I GOT ONE This Book Will Change Your Life: January - Page 8 204853

This Book Will Change Your Life: January - Page 8 204853

I also did some yoga…

DAY 10: HABITATS

IN PROGRESS

DAY 11: Today, introduce yourself to someone you know but never speak to.

I introduced myself to a lot of people today (it was my first day at my student teaching placement) but just in case anyone accused me of cheating I also introduced myself to the bank teller I always go to… It actually wasn’t that awkward at all. And now I have someone to talk to while I am at the bank.

Day 12: What's your type?

· Tall (5’8 and up)

· Dark Hair

· Blue eyes

· Nice jaw line

· Skinny

· Muscular but not crazy muscles, soccer player build

· Great shoes!! (Honestly one of the first things I look at)

· Smart

· Motivated – has goals and a plan for his future that consists of more than just marriage and kids

· Confident

· Sense of humor compatible with my own

· Has a lot of friends, so he has something to do when I am spending time with mine LOL

· Finds most of my flaws attractive or at least never says otherwise.

· Open-minded

DAY 13: Send a letter to a mass murderer!

IN PROGRESS

DAY 14: A day of compliments

I was only around my family for this one... they all thought I wanted something from them...

DAY 15: Be gay for a day!

This is going to be very bad for me because people already wonder if I am gay!!! Oh well, I guess it won’t be too traumatizing for them then? LOL

Task 8am - During rush hour, try to brush up gently against someone in public transportation. This is just to get yourself used to the idea of same-sex contact. Do not push this too far as technically it is known as frottage and could get you arrested.

My adaptation - I had a converstation with my sister this morning about what my "girl-type" was... just to get me used to the idea of same-sex attraction. Her response? "Um... why are you thinking about that?"

11am - The office coffee machine is the ideal casual flirting situation. Wait for the object of your affection to help themselves to a coffee before bumping into them. Their beverage will spill over them, providing you with the perfect opportunity to caress their chest with a kitchen towel.

My adaptation - I held my friends hand while we ate dinner.

1pm - Because of social convention, it is much easier to find a gay mate if you are officially on the lookout. Use your lunch-hour to compose a carefully worded all-staff e-mail in which you come out of the closet. You can always claim it was a misunderstanding tomorrow.

My adaption - I asked my mom what she would do if one day I said I was gay. Her response? "I would still love you... are you trying to tell me something?" (my mom has asked me on several occasions if I like girls, this task will set me back in my goal of convincing her otherwise)

3pm - By now you should have had plenty of responses to your flirting overtures, but you also need to start planning your evening. Ring a close same-gender friend and say you have something important to tell them. Arrange to meet in a romantic bar or restaurant. Candlelight is best.

My adaptation - I actually did this one...

5pm - The end of the office day. As tomorrow you will be able to explain everything, why not turn up the heat a little by squeezing someone's bottom playfully on your way out. If possible, pick someone with a sense of humor.

My adaptation - I sent flirty text messages to several female friends

8pm - By now your date should be going well. After a few drinks, some inadvertent touching, and a lot of eye contact, you will have told your close friend that you think that your relationship could be taken to the next level. They may act unconvinced at first, even play "hard to get," so don't be shy of forcing them to deal with their feeling by grabbing their hand or even french kissing them.

My adaptation - WHAT?! hell no. I bought my friend a drink after telling her about this book/adventure/hi im gay for a day.

11pm - Only one hour left to explore the outer shores of your new sexuality. After today's gradual physical emotional build-up, the last inhibitions shouldn't be too hard to shed. The rest is up to you...

My adaptation - I used my gayness to my advantage by rejecting the advances of some creepy guy at a party. I told him I just wasn't into guys This Book Will Change Your Life: January - Page 8 850857

This Book Will Change Your Life: January - Page 8 850857

BRITISH EDITION - DAY 15 - Ask your loved ones to list your bad points.

My mom wrote: "your my daughter, I am not doing this because I am the only person in the world who doesn't think you have flaws..." thanks mom good to know everyone else thinks I do!! LOL

My sister first asked if we were doing just my personality or my looks too. She was serious. Ouch. She wrote (I told her just my personality today thanks):

1. Over-reacts to situations that aren’t anything at all
2. Control Freak! Must be in charge and in control of everything
3. Assumes the worst way too quickly
4. Acts too maturely, should have more fun and live it up while she is young
5. Intervenes in parenting situations when it’s none of her business
6. Sucks up to mom and dad.
7. Too prim and proper all the time

My brother said when I asked him to write them down “ I only have one, you ask me to do stupid sh!+ I don’t want to do.” He refused to write anything. He added I was a control freak tho...

My dad wrote: "You are a button head, enough said." ... ?

My best friend said:
1. I agree with your sister, you act way too old for your age and don't really know how to have fun. Just because your going to be a teacher doesn't mean you have to act 30
2. Your way too sensitive and you don't take criticism well (GREAT! perfect activity for me...)
3. You always have to be right
4. You don't confront people when they make you mad/ you don't stick up for yourself.
5. You get crazy when your stressed.
6. I don't want to do more because you will probably get upset with me.

These British ones are harsh.

BRITISH EDITION - DAY 16

I think I will stick with confessing something to someone and NOT going to the police station.

IN PROGRESS

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Mon Jan 18, 2010 2:58 am

BRITISH EDITION - DAY 17

I took a 5 dollar bill and wrote "Be the change you want to see in the world" and spent it at the local convenient store Razz

And now today's:

BRITISH EDITION - DAY 18 - Sabotage Hollywood Day

Go to the movies and shout out the ending

I actually did this totally unintentionally Laughing

Somewhat, at least. It was in my living room, rather than the theater, since I'm broke. But I didn't realize my roommate had never seen the Matrix, so I walked in near the end and was like

Spoiler:

I haven't seen the movie in a few years, and I had only ever seen it once to begin with, so I actually couldn't remember. But yeah... I accidentally ruined it for her. I went back to my room, checked today's challenge, and got sooo excited. I'd hate to purposely ruin it for someone, so since it was totally an accident, I feel great Razz

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Mon Jan 18, 2010 2:06 pm

Yay Annie!!! I enjoyed reading yours!!! This Book Will Change Your Life: January - Page 8 707671

Stargazer Posts : 35 Join date : 2010-01-09 Age : 36

Hahaha thanks!! I didn't think anyone would actually read it but I thought it was silly that I had them all typed up and didn't share...

I can't afford a movie either... but I will find something to sabatoge.

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Mon Jan 18, 2010 3:10 pm

Annie wrote:: I used my gayness to my advantage by rejecting the advances of some creepy guy at a party. I told him I just wasn't into guys.

YES!! That's amazing Razz

And omg sabotage hollywood day would be sooooo mean. But also hilarious. You'd certainly get kicked out!

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Tue Jan 19, 2010 4:46 pm

BRITISH EDITION - DAY 19 - Long Lost Relative Day

Judge which one of your elderly relatives is most likely to have hoarded away a pile of cash, and call them up out of the blue to get in their will.

This is another one I'm altering, for two reasons. Number one, trying to get into their will is just horrible, lol. And number two, my elderly relatives? Well, in Canada, all the older relatives we're still in contact with (my extended family is rather broken, to say the least, lol) are 95+. They're not in the best shape. Not sure if they'd really be able to even remember me, since I haven't seen them in a while anyways, lol. As for my dad's family in England, there's only my Nanny, who came out to visit a few weeks ago, and my great auntie. But, I don't want to spend money by calling long-distance. So instead, I'm writing my auntie a letter today, since I haven't seen her in a couple years!

Moderator Posts : 5522 Join date : 2009-09-06 Age : 40

I like the way that one assumes that you've forsaken your elderly relatives. I'm gonna be in fuckin' everyone's will. Hells yeah!

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Wed Jan 20, 2010 12:20 pm

I dont have any elderly relatives.

Moderator Posts : 5522 Join date : 2009-09-06 Age : 40

THAT'S BECAUSE YOU ARE THEM!!!!!!!

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Wed Jan 20, 2010 6:54 pm

lol You Suck.

PS.... you are the only witness to my biggest loser journal. Wink

Well, I have one elderly relative, but, he has nothing to leave in a will. There is no point in contacting him.

Moderator Posts : 5522 Join date : 2009-09-06 Age : 40

HAHAHAHA, I noticed that! I liked it.

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Thu Jan 21, 2010 5:16 pm

Okay, so I've been awful at posting these, and I apologize. I put a reminder in my phone for every day to remind me Smile

So here's what we've got for the past couple o' days:

DAY 16: Discreetly give the finger to people all day

Record your findings. If anyone notices, let us know how it goes.

DAY 17: Eat nothing but asparagus all day long to ascertain just how noxious your pee can get.

Other urine-affecting vegetables include: fennel, eggplant, okra, turnip, ginger.

DAY 18: KILL SOMETHING DAY

So called "Western civilization" suppresses out legitimate aggressive impulses. Cast off the chains of narrow morality and stamp out the sad life of a member of some inferior species today: an ant, or perhaps a gnat of some kind. Indulge your dark urges before they overwhelm you. After all, as top Russian anarchist Mikhail Bakunin declared: the passion for destruction is also a creative passion...

DAY 19: PRETEND TO BE A SECRET AGENT

No one can know. This Book was a pretext to get in touch with you. Your government needs you. Don't look up now, they are watching. Meet at 1300 today outside work. Wave at the gray car. It will pick you up and take you to the secret rendezvous. Good luck. P.S. - Tear this page out and swallow it.

(Another fun way to do this would be to find a highly populated area and find one person to observe; people watch, if you will. Take notes on them as if they were public enemy number one. What are they accused of? Why are they in plain sight? Who are they waiting for? What will they discuss? Take notes appropriately...)

DAY 20: POETRY DAY (edited by Doug due to outdated task...)

Part 1: Your warm-up. Write the next line to this already started poem: "Mercy, cried the popinjay to the pope"

Part 2: Write a poem. Any kind of poem; a sonnet, some freeverse, a haiku perhaps. When you have finished, post it in the "Orbital Moods" forum to share with the world (or the website Razz

)

DAY 21: PATRIOTISM DAY

It is the duty of every citizen to be patriotic. A country is one's soil, one's blood, one's tears, one's roots. Choose a country other than your own that you feel particularly strong about, and be patriotic for a day. Advocate! Convert others to your ways! Start a patriotic rally!

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Thu Jan 21, 2010 5:24 pm

OH BOY this will be fun!!!! I get to write a poem, support another country, I get to kill something and flip people off (i do this all the time anyway) lol I get to be a secret agent too!!! I wont eat asparadisgusting or however you spell that disgusting food. Bleck

Moderator Posts : 5522 Join date : 2009-09-06 Age : 40

Well this ended.

Subject: Re: This Book Will Change Your Life: January Wed Feb 10, 2010 9:55 am

Sorry

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