85 Year Old BAMFs

So, I'm currently in London (well, just outside, at least ), staying with my great-aunt and great-uncle. I figured I'm be stuck inside all day, with no internet, watching Coronation Street.

But nope.

My first night here, my Auntie Joyce told me she was going to take me to work with her. I had no idea where she worked, but I was assuming it would be rather boring, since she's like, 85.

But nope.

Ends up, she's a bartender. I sat at a bar for four hours, while dear ol' Auntie Joyce made drinks and led the bar in singing a song which consisted of the lyrics "Alice? Alice!? WHO THE FUCK IS ALICE!?" I was absolutely exhausted by the time I got home.

The next day, my Uncle Jack took me to a wedding reception. It was getting late, and I was tired, so I was looking around, trying to find him, since I figured he'd be ready to leave too.

But nope.

I found him in the middle of the dance floor, getting his groove on to Sex Bomb.

I seriously can't keep up with this elderly BAMF lifestyle.

I'm finally back home, but I'm still absolutely shocked at how YOUNG they acted! Yesterday morning, they got a call from my second cousin/their grandson, and then- while laughing- relayed his story onto me.

They were all, "That was your cousin Jack on the phone! He spent the night in Bristol with a few friends, but ended up getting completely lost because he was having sex with a stripper in a field, in front of a crowd! I don't get how he gets these girls. He's not that good looking. It must be his charm."

I just stared at them in shock. They were laughing about their nineteen year old grandson having public sex with a stripper. I'm even more shocked that he called his grandparents to tell them he had sex with a stripper.

How do these kind of things even happen? These stories are so unbelievably amazing haha.

The best part is what I heard from my other second cousin later. I guess he didn't want to give all the details to his grandparents, lol. But apparently someone in the crowd pushed him off the girl, into a pile of mud. He was cow-tipped, ahahaha. And, according to him, he got right back up and at 'em, and the girl barely noticed.