No one tells me anything... UNTIL NOW!

So, I've always been the one who's not told until the last minute. I didn't know I was going to Jamaica until TWO DAYS before we left. I didn't know my uncle was getting married until my mom bought me a dress. I didn't know my great-uncle died until it was bought up in conversation two weeks later. I didn't know my cousin was preggers until I mentioned randomly that since I was twin cousins, I hope I have a dormant twin gene that comes alive and gives me twins some day... and my parents were all "BTW, your other cousin is preggers with twins."

ANYWAYS, my brother is not actually my full brother, since my dad was married before he married my mom. My brother, Zach, was only two and a half when they got married though, and I was born a year later, so he was raised by my mom, even if she wasn't his biological mom.

So, I've always been curious why my dad got custody of him, since the mom almost always does. I've asked before, but no one would tell me. I've wondered my WHOLE life. And today, my Nan finally told me the story, and now, I wish I didn't know, since if I ever see that bitch, I'll punch her in the face so hard she can look down her back without turning her head. AND I'M A PACIFIST!

But it ends up they were married for six years, and then my brother was born. She didn't want him, but my dad did. As soon as he was born, she just hated her life because she didn't want her own son and never did. My dad was good friends with their doctor, and she told him that his wife got sterilized after my dad told her he wanted more kids. So much for doctor-patient confidentiality, ahaha. My dad was pissed, but moved on. Well, moved on until she took up "squash lessons". He bought her a racket when she told him that, and got her a nice bag and everything. A few weeks later, he opened up her bag to borrow it (he played squash too), and found it still in it's wrapping. Ends up by "squash lessons", she meant "I met someone else and want to leave you".

So, they divorced. She didn't want Zach, but he was still her son, so she took him every other weekend. He was only one and a half when they divorced, but every time she came to pick him up for the weekend, he'd cry and put up a fight. Then, the weekend before my parents got married, he was at his bio mom's house, and ended up breaking his arm. She claimed he fell down the stairs, and that's the reason my parents always told me when I asked why Zach had a little cast on his arm in their wedding photos. But after that, whenever his mom tried to pick him up on his weekends with her, he threw such a big fight. He was absolutely terrified of her. He wasn't even three yet, but absolutely PETRIFIED over spending the weekend with her, which made my parents believe she had been abusing him. After he threw a particularly big fit, his bio mom simply said, "If he doesn't want me, fine. My life isn't about him anyways. Tell him when he's older that if he wants to see me, he can find me himself." He didn't end up seeing her until his high school graduation.

And after hearing that story for the first time, I"m downright PISSED! I want to attack this woman. And it seems a bit personal to be telling a forum, but I didn't want to tell someone who actually KNOWS my brother and dad, just because I don't want them to be awkward about it. I'd rather vent to strangers.

AIEOHOISDHOGISJG, I WANNA HURT HER

That really blows Jess :/

Sucks that Zach had a pretty shitty experience so early in his life. But I'm glad your dad is with your mom now, and not that crazy "squash" woman.

Yeah, pretty much exactly what Cam said. That woman sounds just plain awful, and I'm glad your dad was able to find someone a bit more not-crazy, lol.

So like, did everyone else know this?

Well, both my parents knew, obviously. My Nan knew, my aunt and uncle kinda knew, and my other aunt was just confused.

See, I never really asked about it, since I figured it must have been bad. Zach didn't see her until his high school graduation. If she was a decent woman and things just didn't work out, she would have seen him more often. Because of the fact I was scared of bringing up bad memories for my parents (my parents started dating RIGHT out of my dad's divorce, since he was desperate to get married again, lol. But since it was so soon, my mom had to deal with this woman too), I never asked either of them.

I could have asked my uncle, but he works on a boat in the Mediterranean, so clearly I never had the chance. I could have asked my aunt, but she and my dad didn't speak for ten years and only just reunited a year and a half ago, so I didn't feel comfortable talking to her about my dad. So, I asked my other aunt. But she wouldn't tell me. She told me that she had spoken to both my dad and his ex, and got both stories, but they were different and she didn't think it was fair to tell me any of it, in case it was wrong. She told me to ask my dad, which I didn't want to.

So, I asked my Nan, and she flat out told me the whole thing. She told me that my dad didn't really tell people what happened. That's why his siblings were all kinda confused over it. He lived in Canada at that point, while the rest were in England, so there wasn't much communication.

But I totally had a dream about this woman last night, and I woke up rather amused at it. I dreamt that she and Zach stopped by my parents house to grab something (Zach sees her time to time now), and I happened to be there. He was all "Meet my real mom!" And she was all "Nice to meet you!" Then I said "Wish I could say the same to you." Zach said "That's kinda rude." So I said, "And it wasn't rude when she cheated on Daddy and said she never wanted you?" Then she reached up to slap me, but I punched her first.

Then I woke up. I feel dream-me is preparing and training me for a potential future meeting.

Jess wrote:

Then she reached up to slap me, but I punched her first.

I laughed out loud at this

Way to go!!

Dream-me doesn't take crap from anyone!

Aw that's horrible! I can't believe she'd treat her own kid like that!!