I read the greatest book last night

As I start writing this, it occurs to me I should go to the books forum, but I'm already here and don't feel like moving.

But I scanned my Nan's bookshelf last night to find something to read, and came across a gem called "Virgin on her Wedding Night"

Just read the back of the book:

"Already haunted by a youth of illegitimacy and poverty, Valente Lorenzatto has never forgiven Caroline Hales' abandonment of him at the alter. But now Valente has made millions and claimed his aristocratic Venetian birthright, and he's poised to buy Caroline's family lock, stock and barrel. So she'll have to submit to his revenge! Perhaps his new found wealth and lineage will soften her up when he demands that she give him their wedding night for which hes waited five long years... He'll make her pay... between the sheets."

Best book ever.

Jess wrote:

He'll make her pay... between the sheets."

Yes.

The last line of the novel is the BEST! Most harlequin romances (yes, this novel is romance, despite sounding like rape, ahaha) end with a happy, loving scene. But this one finished by her being like "I've been trying to find the right time to tell you this but... our cat is pregnant." and he was like "It's okay... we'll raise the kittens in the villa."

Then it ended.

This book...is all about rape...I hope that cat at least got some that it wanted.

I love how the whole book is about THE wedding night, but it's barely mentioned, ahaha. She refused to have sex with him on their wedding night, and had an argument instead, that only lasted a page and a half. Then they had sex near the end, which only lasted a page. But it included a sentence that said "He probed her womanhood with his throbbing member", and I laughed really hard at it. I love how they write "romantic" sex scenes in novels.

That is so much more romantic than what I would have written "He stuffed her creep cave with juicy oozing man sausage"

Rear Admiral MoMo wrote:

"He stuffed her creep cave with juicy oozing man sausage"

Reading that made me cringe

That's why I don't write romance.

because it would be

BAD ROMANCE!!!!

did you cringe reading that too?